Light bulb jokes have been around for quite some time and have enveloped every profession, race, and niche group in existence. University and college rivals have unleashed a plethora of light bulb jokes against rivals to support their own school spirit.
It is widely held that the light bulb joke is an American construction originally used with the Polish as the brunt of the joke. These racial light bulb jokes were popular in the U.S. in the 1960s and 1970s but it has been found that other racial groups used the same jokes around the same time with another group of people on the receiving end of the joke. Some examples are:
British target the Irish
Russians target Moldavians and Ukrainians
Ukrainians target Russians
The Spanish target those who live in Lepe
Norwegians and Finns target the Swedish
Swedes target the Norwegians
The Dutch target Belgians
Indians target Pakistanis
Soon afterward the light bulb joke spread from its racial box to encompass professions, organizations, and finally colleges and universities adapted the joke into their rivalries.
What is a Light Bulb Joke?
The light bulb joke is of a sort called an endless variation joke. In theory, the joke can be extended as infinitely as language allows. The punch line of the joke is always insulting to the subject of the joke. The general setup is as follows:
Q: How many [insert subject here] does it take to change a light bulb?
A: [any number, 0 to millions]. [Explanation for the quantity provided.]
The comedy of the joke comes from highlighting real or stereotypical feature of the subject group and can be modified by:
1. Quantity of people needed to change the light bulb.
2. Duration of the light bulb change.
3. Using a double entendre by using a sexual definition of the word screw. (English language)
4. Using the word change to refer to the subject of the joke, a cultural factor, or a social factor instead of the light bulb.
Common Ivy League College and popular University Light Bulb Jokes
How many Dartmouth students does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They dont have electricity in Hanover.
How many Sarah Lawrence students does it take to change a light bulb?
Six. One to change the light bulb and five to perform an interpretive dance about it.
How many Connecticut College students does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change the light bulb and one to complain that if this were a better school, the light wouldnt have burnt out.
How many Amherst students does it take to change a light bulb?
Thirteen. One to change the bulb and the others to form an a cappella group to capture the event in song.
How many Princeton students does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to mix martinis while the other calls an electrician.
How many Kenyon students does it take to change a light bulb?
We dont know. We couldnt find the campus.
How many Boston University students does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to change the bulb and the other two to check his math homework.
How many Brown students does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten. One to change the light bulb and ten to share the experience.
How many Cornell students does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change the light bulb and one to crack under pressure.
How many Penn students does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but she gets six credits for doing it.
How many Yale students does it take to change a light bulb?
None. There is nothing in New Haven worth seeing.
How many Tufts students does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to change the light bulb and another to proclaim how it was done as well as an Ivy Leaguer.
How many Georgetown students does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change the light bulb, one to report to Congress about the progress made, and two to throw the bad bulb at students of American University.
How many Columbia students does it take to change a light bulb?
Seventy-six. One changes the light bulb, fifty protest the bulbs right to not change, and twenty-five hold a counter-protest.
How many Williams students does it take to change a light bulb?
All of them. Being snowed in, everyone jumps at something to do.
How many Bard students does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but shell only change it if its an alternative light bulb.
Other College Light Bulb Jokes
How many MIT students does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to design a nuclear light bulb that never burns out, one to figure out how to power all of Boston using the nuclear light bulb, one to install it, and one to write a computer application to control the wall switch.
How many Vassar students does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten. One to screw the light bulb and nine to support its sexual orientation.
How many Middlebury students does it take to change a light bulb?
Four. One to change the light bulb and three to find the perfect J. Crew outfit for the changing.
How many Stanford students does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, dude.
How many Oberlin students does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to change it and two to make a bong out of the old one.
How many Duke students does it take to change a light bulb?
An entire frat if you can find someone in one sober enough to get the job done.
How many Swarthmore students does it take to change a light bulb?
Eighteen. Each one is smart enough to change the light bulb but they are all shaking too much from the overload of stress.
How many Wesleyan students does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Wesleyan students are boycotting GE as part of the military-industrial complex.
How many Boston College students does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten. One to change the light bulb and nine to throw a party to celebrate not screwing it in upside down.
How many Reed students does it take to change a light bulb?
One and she doesn’t even need a ladder since she is wearing her platform Birkenstocks.
The College Light Bulb Joke Never Ends
This listing is only an example of some of the college light bulb jokes out there. A great many more exist and many use the same punch line while changing only the subject of the joke. It can be a great party game to try to make up as many as you can about your own college rival.
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